Lauren Hartford M.A., LCPC, ALMFT
Summer is the season of busyness and excitement. This is the season that we look forward to all year, when the snow melts away, nature blooms and flourishes green, and we get to enjoy the small window of heat that the Midwest grants us. In the season of it all comes a pressure for us to wring out every little drop of summer that we can get, which can often look like overflowing our calendars with BBQs, late nights-out with friends, road trips, and those travel baseball plans. It can feel like a whirlwind, when all of a sudden, it’s the end of August and
we are completely exhausted. Summer is gone, and in getting back into the normal routines of school, work, and home life, we are left with the question of, “where did the time go, and why am I so drained?”
There is endless pressure to compact as much “fun” during the summer season. Often times in summers past, I have found myself overscheduling so much that it seems like every night, every weekend, there is some sort of commitment. Concerts, traveling to see friends and family that live near and far, park and pool hangouts, baseball games—all sound so fun in the moments scheduled. However, by the time those commitments are in full-swing, I am left exhausted and wondering why I said yes to so many things. The plans that allow me to “maximize” the summer season brought me exhaustion and disconnection.
In summers past, my intentions were good. But with each yes, I found myself increasingly depleted. Fun shouldn’t feel like an obligation, and I could have enjoyed my summer season more if I were to be more mindful with my time and being more present in my chosen commitments. How would my summer feel if I were able to take a pause to check in with myself before hitting yes to one more evite?
This summer, I am taking a different approach. One rooted in mindfulness, being present with myself, and allowing myself permission-not just to enjoy, but to rest.
Be Present: Feel First, Do Second
Instead of rushing to say yes to every invite or event, pause and check in with how you’re actually feeling. What do you need today? Do I truly want to commit to another dinner plan, or would I feel more nourished by sitting barefoot in my backyard with a book? Joy can come from being with others, but it can also come from quiet moments with yourself.
Prioritize What (and Who) Fills Your Cup
Not every plan fills us with the same joy. This summer, I’m focusing on time with the people who truly see me—who fill my cup, not drain it. Connection doesn’t need to be performative or packed with plans; sometimes, the most meaningful moments are quiet, simple, and authentic. Call or visit someone who reminds you of who you are—not out of obligation, but because your soul feels better after being around them. Prioritize the things that will recharge and refill your spirit, even if that does not fit the mold of summers past.
Honor Both the “Wants” and the “Needs”
There are places we’re drawn to—and places we tend to avoid. Go to both. Visit that spot you’ve been daydreaming about, and also tend to the things you’ve been pushing off (yes, even if it’s therapy, paperwork, or a long-postponed conversation with that difficult family member). Summer doesn’t mean abandoning the routines and care that support us during the rest of the year. Spontaneity is beautiful, but balance is grounding.
Journal on What You Truly Need
Take a moment to write down what you need from this season—not what social media says, not what your calendar says. You. What would bring you peace, joy, and clarity this summer? Reflect on past seasons: What drained you? What brought you back to life? What would it look like to have a summer that leaves you feeling full, not frazzled? How can you practice being present, even in the busyness of the season? Where do you need to say no so you can say a deeper yes to yourself? Use that wisdom to shape a season of intention, not just activity.
The Gentle Reminder
Summer isn’t a contest for who had the most adventures or took the most selfies in the sun. It’s a season—and seasons, by nature, are meant to ebb and flow. Let your summer include moments of stillness. Let it include boundaries, quiet, slow mornings, and early nights. Let it be full of what you need, not what you think you should be doing.
This summer, I’m giving myself permission to be rather than just do. Maybe you need that too. Here’s to a summer of meaning, memories, and mindfulness.